It`s been a few weeks or even months that I`ve been feeling down and empty inside. Although I show a happy face in front of my friends and family. I don`t know how to explain how I`m feeling right now, but I just know that a lot has been happening lately and I haven`t been myself lately. This feeling is eating me inside and I just want to cry to someone but then again I can`t do it.

I`ve been having a lot of family problems and of course people would say "Everyone has their problem so why can`t you just tell someone?" Well in my case it`s different and with a lot of tension going on, I can`t seem to find someone and even tell the problem I am having or even how I`m feeling.

Sometimes I just want to fall off the building or even disappear from everyone and not come out at all. I appreciated the people around me making jokes and cheering me up but I can`t seem to feel happy. Like.. I just don`t really know how to explain this feelings. Friends may just see the happy side of me but they don`t know the falling side of me - going into depression once again and I know many would say say, you`re not suppose to keep your feelings to yourself, you just gotta let it all out and express it to someone.

I`ve gone into depression before and I was hoping not to go there again but a lot of things has happen and slowly I`m falling into pure darkness and slowly into depression. Yeah people may say that I`m just posting/saying this for attention but I`m not. Those people who think people are just saying this for attention then you`re wrong, place yourself in their shoes if they were you how would you feel? I mean of course there`ll be a few who would do this for attention but majority are not. If you`re kind enough then you should stop saying mean things and help them instead.

For once I`m posting this in my blog and I don`t want to ruin people`s mood or something, so I will still keep continuing posting things here as I`ve had a feeling to delete this blog but then again I have a lot of people reading this and people would like to know me better so I`ll be trying to post more in the future but for now I`m gonna to take a break away from social networks.




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